Focusing on the past and present life of my brother Dan, who at 18 years old survived a severe traumatic brain injury (TBI), Belonging after Brain Injury: Relocating Dan is part biography; (minor) part memoir; an accessible exploration of some of the neuropsychological effects of TBI; and a treatise on the paramount, even life and death, importance of social connection and belongingness. It probes some of the psychosocial aspects of TBI and aphasia, offering perspectives and strategies that can help alleviate some of the seemingly intractable problems that accompany these conditions. It won’t fix everything, but it provides context and insight into some of the challenges faced by both survivors and their families.

At its core, Dan’s story emphasizes the value of connection, as well as the continuing worth of his life. I know people who think—and a few who have said—they’d rather die than live with Dan’s various impairments. (Early on, I was one of them.) Believing that someone’s life is no longer worthwhile reduces the possibilities for connection with them. Living differently, albeit with considerable limitations and challenges, is still living. Even when it’s not apparent, it’s possible for many TBI survivors to find contentment as well as challenge in their lives. An essential key to that contentment is belongingness, the sense of connectedness to others, as opposed to the exclusion, isolation, and loneliness that survivors too often suffer. This message—that people living with severe impairments can live good lives but need connection to others to do it—is one that families, caregivers, other care providers, and the public at large need to understand in order to connect with survivors and help them obtain the belongingness we all need.

Belonging after Brain Injury also provides practical information about TBI itself. I discuss some of the typical physical, psychological, and psychosocial symptoms (and their consequences) that often accompany severe TBI, as exemplified by Dan’s life. Understanding survivors’ various problems doesn’t make their difficulties go away, but sometimes it provides guidance and helps those who love or provide care for survivors to better manage their effects. Grasping that everyone in the equation is human, with the attendant flaws and occasionally difficult interactions that inevitably accompany all human being, is foundational to reformulating, redeveloping, and maintaining satisfying (if sometimes thorny) relationships. My book illustrates these concepts as they have unfolded in Dan’s interactions with those around him.

Additionally, this account of Dan’s life maps the institutional, psychological, and social labyrinths my brother has had to negotiate, with more or less success, over the span of more than forty years of life with TBI. Had his family (not least of all I myself) and others who have been charged with his care better understood some of the concepts and practical knowledge I write about, at least some of the hardships he has endured over the years could have been lessened, if not completely avoided. Certainly, the insights I gained in writing the book have helped me, after all these years, to better help him.

Belonging after Brain Injury: Relocating Dan offers a personal perspective into the life of one man who’s dealt with the effects of TBI for more than four decades. I wrote this book expressly for the families of severe TBI survivors, medical and mental health providers, and professional caregivers. But its value isn’t bounded by these groups. I believe it will be useful to anyone who is interested in understanding the psychological, social, and physical impact of severe disability, and the need for connection that is common to us all.

Belonging after Brain Injury: Relocating Dan is available at Routledge and Amazon (and elsewhere).